Wow...

I didn't realize it had been so long since i posted but, i have returned!!! been working and reflecting. drawing new tattoo designs, rehashing old ones, including previously mentioned thesis work. 2 days away from what was to be one of the best days of my life and i will be working, not able to see my family until june maybe and still in debt. I live though so there is no sorrow only brighter futures and more colorful dreams.

been stuck playing too many videogames lately too, now that i have the time that is, especially GTA 4. probably the best game i've played in a long time, if ya don't believe me just check the reviews or pick up a copy for yourself and see what i mean. so realistic you WANT to FOLLOW THE RULES of life and law, but alas the RPGs fly and there goes your wanted level.

anyways, hit up my cell if ya wanna chat or look for me online in Liberty City, my psn is eyesofreality i start my day on top of the Get a Life building with a sniper rifle in hand dressed in all black, decimating those who test my patience.
until then...

No Worries...No Regrets...

... only happiness and good health await me. yea Smitty the light could be a freight train but in this situation it isn't. i actually feel good that i am not there, my health is coming back to par, slowly, and my work is beginning to have more meaning as i go. there has been deviation from my thesis although the imagery is similar... just executed in a more appropriate manner. i will post some pics as i finish.

to clarify the air, since some of you want personal emails, i figured i'd just openly state the facts here.

Thesis Panel said i should drop tutorial, which would cease my show and thusly not allow me to receive my diploma, which was the goal here, not the work now that i think about it. me being hard headed, physically and mentally ill(according to my doctors) and thusly being financially ruined from loans to pay school, have really helped me decide to walk away completely.yea i invested the time and money but that doesn't matter, money should NEVER matter when it comes to ones self. all that i am concerned about is my own well being, be that physical or mental, i am just drained from my thesis work both on the paper and in the work itself. I am planning on trying to get this work up in a gallery once it is completed, but that is still some time away, seeing as i now have the time and energy to execute to my fullest potential.

my thanks go out to those who have expressed their thoughts and well wishes, wether it be here or in email.
I hope that all of you are doing well with your own work, and i will try to make it out to each of the openings and show my support, especially Resolution Revolution their show is going to be great, as are the others respectively.

only 2 months guys, only 2 months... keep those heads up!!!

...until then...

Well now its finally happened...

... although not yet official,I am being asked to step down from my ranks at the prestigious Art Academy of Cincinnati. well i suppose that this does in fact make me want to go and cry to mommy but i think i will live.
I would like to sincerely apologize to my thesis group for departing so far along into the planning, i will still be there to support the group opening day, i just wish i was there to share in the final sigh of relief when it is all said and done.
to the faculty and staff...you should already know how i feel and i hope it haunts you to know that you robbed a kid of his dreams 33 days before they came to realization.
I hope you all are doing well with your work.
May the light at the end of the tunnel be the beginnings for you all, as it now is for me.
...until then...

i need a new good computer

one that is compatable with my 37"tv it has a pc in plug but i dunno how to do all of that. my comp just crashed during saving of my chest color piece, officially corrupting it the night before it is gettin put on crit watch for tutorial. i will be up for the duration of the night trying to redo what was lost, which was a shitton.
hope all goes well with you guys and your work!

Pushing onward...

...to destiny!!!! things are picking up despite negative attitudes from faculty here at the Art Academy. Almost halfway there, colour palette decisions are being finalized, my right arm is almost complete along with my chest. that leves the left arm and back, print, frame and hang alll before April 5. on pace, on track....all that's left is prayer and of course the thesis paper. good luck to you all!!!
...until then...

peace of mind......

... after another virtually sleepless night i have come to the realization that i may very well be going insane! what was i writing in my previous post? venting frustrations into a blog when that should be put forth into art, that was my quest of the night, and i succeeded in completing those 2 pieces for you Mr. Henson, a mere 12 hours after your request.maybe it will be 4 by the time you get back from your week off, you never know!
on to the next set of work the AIGA review poster designs, of which Christy I know you will probably go insane about my poor design qualities, and that's ok. learn from the mistakes you make and build upon their foundations greatness.
anger control and personal things should be my main concern, i fly off the handle without hesitation anymore now, which is scary after spending years of my youth in counceling for just that.

what is the new wave of art to go with the academics that we discussed in class 2 days ago...i think i have to sit on that over the weekend and really think about it before i post again, i want it to be right and not something that just fulfills the assignment.
...until then...

i just don't understand...

sorry to those who may take my venting the wrong way but here it goes...

"Prove us wrong" they said to me.
Well in that case...since school can't refund my tuition, I will.
You'd better be ready, because if you all thought i was slacking you should be ashamed. I have been working my fingers to the bone, i have lost 20... yea 20... POUNDS of weight that i can't afford to lose just so i can be here this year, and you bastards tell me i should take some time off, you make me SICK.

I know my thesis wasn't that good, and I haven't shown you a ton and a half of work, but at least i'm working, i am trying, and i am sacrificing almost everything, just to get a little respect and peace of mind. i've been here almost 5 years now, and never have i felt so disrespected.i don't even know why, maybe because some think i don't care, that i'm slacking, that this is a conscious decision on my part to totally screw myself in my senior year, i wish that was the case it would make more sense that way.
wow that felt good to get off my chest, and you all know how i feel and that makes it all the better.
And the final showdown continues, i will continue to do what i have been doing, i will have my work done, ON TIME along with my thesis.

heres the list and number of pieces that will be ready for my show, some of which are done now i just haven't had the convience to transport to school due to size and framing issues.

1 fine art pieces displaying my chest/sides tattoo designs
1 fine art piece displaying my back tattoo design

chest layout with figure outline layout
left side figure layout
right side figure layout
back figure layout
right arm layout
left arm layout
that's 14 finished pieces plenty for a show, and plenty for my paper.
*note that the above list outside of the fine art pieces will be accompanied by digital prints of the designs over-layed onto my figure as example of the design continuity and application.

pass or fail this year i know i did my best and that's all that matters, with or without a diploma in my hand...with or without it...it doesn't matter anymore.i'm not giving up, i'm just playing by my rules now.

i will do all that i can for my exhibition group whatever you guys need just let me know, i'll be there for you, anything... i mean that with the wholeness of my heart and soul. you all asked me to show with you, and i thought no one would do that, thank you :)

hope all is well for everybody and that your papers and works are going along well. 3 more months guys and gals...3 more months...

...until then...

...sorry i'm so late with this...

yet another post reflecting the mind of a starving artist. thesis work continues along at pace, a few kinks in the road earlier put me back a few days but i made up for it this weekend. punishing myself to sleepless nights just so class can be canceled, figures. but at least i have work up, and that work reflects my inner cosmos, calm amidst chaos. the title of the main chest and side piece is Keepers of The Grove. kinda fits, i am thinking on using that title but in Latin to keep in stride with my roots in catholic faith. good idea?

still searching...waiting...wondering, praying (great now i rhyme. lolz) on to the next project whilst current work is hanging at school. focusing on my arms, heaven and hell, inner demons and relentless divinity, ever present as it currently may seem.rambling again, back to drawing.

the journey continues, enjoy the ride.
...until then...

Response to Design=Heart? article...

... really don't know what to say other than i agree with Stefan. Actually all forms of art, both mainstream and off-the-cuff, can greatly influence the emotions of the masses. isn't that what we as artists strive for?  emotional connection to our art...at least that is what i strive for with my art. i find that all i may really be searching for is reaction as opposed to action, leaving the "action" to the viewer to carry out as they see fit, wether they know so or not.

I may not really be hitting on anything with this response, but it seems to make sense to me.

further info on the article in question can be found via search under the tags: design issues, Design=Heart?, and the author of the article Carolyn McCarron Sienicki.

Thats all for now.

...until then...

let the games begin...

well i figured it was about time to get this whole blog thing going. don't really know what to say other than the fact i am ready to get this final semester over here at the Art Academy. not that i don't like the place, hell i've been here for close to 5 years now, its just time for me to move on to new frontiers. hopefully this thing will help get contacts and get the ball rollin'!!!!
working on thesis materials is taking it outta me, but i am more prepared for this semester than i was last. this should keep me going in the right direction.changing some things in terms of the actual artwork, moving the imagery from an altar to the altar of the body gives me a more concrete understanding as to why i am working with the imagery of heaven, hell, creation, death, and consciousness. tying in my own personal history also give me a feel that i am coming closer to the answers i seek.

who are we?
where do we come from?
why do we fear death?

maybe soon i will be able to answer these questions for myself.
...until then...

This is a test....

...of the emergency art system...this is only a test.